Poem: Exalted

You're such a misery
calling out like a Church
wanting to be first in line
initiating the first act of perjury
so bound to psychology-
bent like a thesis and pulled like a theory

You're such a misery
wailing on like an emergency
alerting all to your turns and trips
rolling your eyes in your made-up head

you're such a misery
miserable abreast my shadow
miserable beneath the crystal glow
wishing you could really know
which way my similes go
you paper-torn piece of philosophy
un-jaded, reprimanded, kinda lost and crazy
laying there, miserably
pretending to be dead
along the sheen of my bed

though so soft and lively
inside my head

-Raeez Jacobs

The Optimistic Circumference

I guess this is an optimistic blog post, and why the fuck not, huh? I'm so dejected by how feeble-bodied, unstable, and too-quick-to-retrieve I have been recently; and I maintain the same for many a "presumed" agile-bodied persons around me. 

This blog in effect, is a tri-catharsis. Simplistically, it's a trifecta; a trio of inspirational pieces- symbolically positioned in three's, with homage to the Old Wives Tales that deemed three a digit of luck, so to say, vis.a.viz stories such as 3 blind Mice, the 3 musketeers, Thrice as lucky, independently etc, etc. 

The pictures aren't indicative of anything closely resembling facets of an ego or a sentiment, rather they summarize or juxtapose those emotions, resembling what they reflect (instead of defining what they are)

Picture 1: The adage in itself is what compelled to 'randomly' select this picture, having saved it not so long ago. "We develop from the negatives," what a deductively significant premise by which to understand our condition; our innate humanity, in our own undoing, our mortality, and mere nothingness in the face of whatever presides over us. There must be something infinite, beyond our trajectory and our understanding, that doesn't seek to sustain us, but merely presides over us as median of continuum and momentum, or better, the ongoing of things- keeper of the timeline. The one who understands what we'll forever be unsure of, doubt, wonder about, and struggle to remember. In retrospect, this adage is discipline; a sheer lesson through which we could be humbled, through a subtle reminder of our mere humanness, and the necessary imperfection that precedes that. It screams, don't be so fixated, let loose, but don't forget where you're coming from. What happened in the past is always going to matter, but that doesn't mean we should live trying to ameliorate that...we must develop. 

Picture 2: This picture, featuring the Kardashian sister, Kourtney clad in a whimsical, chic, and modernistic set of apparel going about her daily activities, out and about on the fame-sizzling shores of Los Angeles, California, is a direct or a robust allusion to the desires, similarities, differences, distinctions, and social patterns by which I exist, and through which I seek a sense of equality, inspiration, and in most respects, from which I derive sheer entertainment. I can't even answer the question: why do you like the Kardashians  so much? anymore, because I've reverted to an extreme sense of antipathy where concern in my likes and dislikes are concerned; it doesn't matter so significantly to me, that I should need to validate it. I know what I like, and I wouldn't like it, if I wasn't so inclined. Explain? no.

Not long ago it was their relentless willingness to succeed, perfect, create, astonish, amuse, entertain, and unanimously inspire, that drew me towards them, like a fly to a UV light. It was inevitable. Perhaps I had long shared similar ambitions, and reveled being able to watch them egress, through the unyielding, fabulous, and tireless efforts of the Kardashian sisters, whose contrasting personalities were a blithe reflection of the enhanced and developing personas every single person, or select persons might harbor within them. A gentle reminder of the abnormality in your life, and then the reality of their very "nothingness", in what has evolved into an age of mass media and pop culture transformation, responsible for churning out artists such Britney Spears, Michael Jackson, Madonna, Beyonce, and the album-gurgling, Rihanna whose Barbados-inspired beats have long indoctrinated even the most seasoned of music listeners. 

All that and I still had to justify my liking...No way. Let it be. I dig all of them, and in terms of its significance or poignancy on this list, it's a relation between my "utilities or modes" of catharsis- my runway, or strip, whatever you'd wish to coin it, from the murky air of what vexes me; it's a platform whereon I may escape, retreat into, and exile myself in solitary freedom. A dose of "fabulosity".

Picture 3: without fleeing off on a tangent, this picture was selected because it's one of my most recent, with one of my Wits buddies, Italian-cliche, GlamTrio doll, and Musician, Samantha Jacobs whose formal surname is actually Cerasoli. I met SammiSmoochie in the year I repeated my Italian (After the attempt Azizza, Claire, and I made the previous year), and I didn't envision our friendship transpiring into what it has become now. We're really close and very alike, in that we're both passionate about the Arts and Entertainment industry. Sam is like, among the other few friends I have, whose judgement and opinion I will actually take to heart and earnest consideration- pertinently in the creative sphere. Sam inspires me through and through, and really we push and uplift each other so much, both trying slavishly to reach the apex of our wildest dreams. I am confident that she'll rise to her zenith, and that no matter what, our friendship will remain unhindered by whichever effects may unravel as we tarry on. We share some rather rampant, wild, and out of this world memories, and experiences, extending from the Drakensburg all the way to shindigs here in the groovy Highveld. And this photo is a visual reminder of all that was just said, so it's partially empowering, partially influential, and in some way, motivating to look at this and remember what needs be remembered, and to cling to whichever rope it is I am clinging onto. 

...A Little Thing called a TimeLine...

2008

Matriculates from Nur-ul-Islam School

2009

Starts BA degree at Wits, initially subjects were: International Relations, Philosophy, Italian, and Film, Visual and Performing Arts in the 1^st semester. In the second, I dropped Italian for Linguistics, and FVPA for Psychology.

2010

BA continues with Philosophy, 1^st semester IR, and Italian is picked up again with new friend Nadia (repeating literally), and Psychology is replaced by English Literature one.

2011

Becomes official “second year” only, having amended majors from Philosophy and IR, to English and Italian. Anthropology is picked up to complete the points for eligibility at level II.

2012

Final year (3^rd year) though literal fourth, majors from level II are carried over to year 3, and doing only one module of Anthropology I, in the first semester.

At midyear, halts studying following June examinations.

Fills official “cancellation of registration” until further notice form at Humanities Faculty;

Sign-out process ensues and graduation is held akimbo, until completion of sem II units in English and Italian.

August 2012

Enrols at Brumilda Acting Academy & Agency, to begin some form of performing and acting training-

Course runs on Saturdays, and usually extends to the later part of day before concluding.

Develops show reel and has exam photo shoot with Renico Van Rensburg

Completes course with an A

Agency representation ensues

December 2012

Auditions for NYFA (New York Film Academy) doing two modern monologues: 1. Torch Song Trilogy monologue by David Beckoff, and 2. “Charlie” Manson, in the film adaptation of the 1960s cult-driven noir about the brutal slayings, dictated by the Acid-doused, prophetic, and deceptive Charles Manson, who led Susan Atkins and Tex Watson amongst others to murder the inhabitants of Cielo Drive. One of the slain turned out to be emerging Hollywood actress, Sharon Tate.

2013

Despondent by impartial scholarship and need based grant

Begins “serial fund-hunting”

Reluctant having been sent little to no casting briefs.

Awaiting approval from National Arts Council and National Film & Video Foundation

April 2013

Considers alternatives

Plans around polythetic categories

Accepting possibilities and embracing multifarious prospects

Resumes and persists with fund-hunting nonetheless

Also plans to resubmit form to Wits to complete BA Final Year as possibility

#ConfusionMode  

Sunday Inspirazione: Festival of Style

#LooKbooK: Points of Ivy

so ivy. so not deadly.

I love this photo from the other day. It contrasts so well with the greenery all around- including the mental-cum-metaphorical green, y'know. I'm not big on green though, but I thought the merging of colours and the shifting of themes between clothing and ambiance was so stark, that I just had to take the photo. I threw a varied-color, striped scarf in, to break some of the dark, because I'm donning a black T, black skinny jeans, and black footwear. The shirt is on-green-on-olive-somewhat-military, which I really love. Shaquille was the photog and thank God, because not everyone takes really good pictures. It's NOT just about taking the photo, it's about being able to capture what should be displayed, and I appreciate an attentive, assertive, and eager photographer, whose skills allows what's being captured, to be displayed immaculately, whilst simultaneously highlighting the contours of his own craft.

When you tell these inanimate things my name. Imagine.

In this case, it's modeling and not the pool, though as you can see, the angle from which he took it balances it out perfectly, so that I don't seem as if I happened to the pool nor the scene or something. There's equilibrium, and no dissidence in shading, setting, nor position. If he stood any more right or left, it would be a picture of the pool with me plonked in it, and that's the attentive qualities a lot of people lack when they take photos. Sometimes you can really see the difference between when I am behind the cam, and then when I am in the front, because I put a lot into making sure I capture my friends, or whatever I'm capturing really well.

Be Nice

#ReggaeAgainstRapeNAbuse

Pledge your support through the creative and artistic milieu, by attending the Reggae Against Rape and Abuse concert, taking place May 4 at Shikisa, Newtown from 12 midday to 12 Midnight. Tickets are reasonably priced and kids get it on free, so supporting this initiative isn't going to cost too much. Bring all your scene-kid friends, hippies, and other normal people too, so that art can change the way we seek to make change in the world. It's not a conference, it's a concert. Make a date.

For more information and to RSVP, just click here